Thursday, May 29, 2008

Clay Aiken not gay, still creepy.

American Idol Clay Aiken is evidently not gay, which I have to admit comes as something of a shock. Balancing out that thunderbolt is the fact that he is becoming more creepy looking by the minute, and his baby momma is pretty weird too. I have nothing against Clay Aiken except for the fact that his music sucks. I also have nothing against gay people. I am boggled that this particular blend of peanut butter and chocolate doesn't go together, but whatever.

As far as his baby momma goes, it's weird on several levels. To begin with, her name is "Jaymes". That's right, "Jaymes". That's not so much weird as ironic, given that Clay Freaking Aiken managed to find a girl named Jaymes. The weird part is that she is 50. Evidently, Clay has been unable to turn his American Idol stardom towards normal groupies, and is instead enjoying the lovely lady lumps of the elderly. Creepy.

Creepier yet is just how that guy looks. He has always been a little odd looking, but since he has parlayed his fame of singing horrible pop songs into a career of singing horrible Broadway show tunes, he has just gotten more and more discomforting to look at. I mean, not Michael Jackson odd, but just odd. I do think it's funny that his fans refer to themselves as "Claymates", but past that, there just isn't a whole lot going on there that I approve of. It is, however, pretty fun imagining Clay Aiken in a fistfight. Seriously, take a good look at the picture below, and then imagine him screaming "Your about to get Clay O'd, Beeyatch" while wading into a bar fight. That's just awesome.

In conclusion, I find Clay Aiken somewhat repulsive. Good Day.
Breaking News: Clay Aiken might still be gay! It turns out that his baby momma was artifically inseminated, implying that Clay Aiken likes children, but not chicks. Word!


Anonymous said...

& I thought I was the only one in the world who thought Clay Aiken was CREEPY!! Thumbs up! But, I do find him just as creepy as Michael Jackson .... ewwww!

Anonymous said...

I can imagine your emotions are torn right now...I mean not knowing if your true love is gay or straight.. Good luck on your qwest for man love buddy.

J.R.Shirley said...

Yeah...I was pointing out his album in Sam's to Jordy two days ago. Dude looks weird as hell. And totally not gay, mmmkay?

Anonymous said...

I actually used to like his looks. Kind of geeky, kInd of sweet. This new look has to go. He looks reallly strange. Team Straight doesn't want him. I'm not sure if Team Gay would want him. Team Michael Jackson , maybe..

katdish said...

In the interest of journalistic integrity, I feel the need to point out that, according to People Magazine (the bedrock of journalistic integrity), Clay Aiken is, in fact, gay.

(Knock me over with a feather!)