Wednesday, December 26, 2007

uh.. Never mind the previous post.

How could I possibly have forgotten that something awesome did happen? A tiger ate someone, and now police think there might have been a human accomplice. Word?

Look, don't get me wrong, it sucks that someone got eaten by a tiger. I know that it is in poor taste to be laughing, but we live in the United States of America. Death by tiger is exceedingly rare, and when it happens, it is awesome. What makes it funny is the ensuing backlash.

In this particular case, the backlash is that there is speculation that perhaps visitors were taunting the tiger, causing it to get so angry as to leap across it's enclosure and start kicking ass. There is also speculation that someone might have slid a board across the tigers moat to help it along. If either of these is true, then I feel less sorry for the recently eaten. If your stupid enough to taunt a tiger, you deserve being made into delicious prey. I go to the zoo frequently, and while I occasionally taunt the lemurs, I never taunt the giant predators.

What do you yell at a tiger to get it so mad anyway? "Hey Tiger, your the mascot at Clemson, and they suck!"? I can see where that would enrage the tiger since Clemson ended up second in the Atlantic Coast conference and #15 in the nation. Of course, that's assuming the tiger is a fan of NCAA football, which while likely, is an assumption on my part.

The other option, sliding the board across the moat, just seems stupid beyond comprehension. Why in the world would you make a bridge for the tiger? If that is in fact what happened, I guarantee that one of the following was the reason"
1. Crazy Vegan/PETA supporter who felt the tiger needed to roam free. In San Diego.
2. Crazy, yet inventive, suicide seeker.
3. A combination of the above.

Anyway, I will be keeping close tabs on this story, as it is right up my alley. Watch here for breaking news.

1 comment:

Randy said...

This just in, Lemurs excape and attack Greeley man...