Thursday, August 7, 2008

The coolest headline ever.

My buddy Randy, who should be listed as an official contributor to TWWOT as he regularly sends me potentially bloggable stuff, sent me what I believe to be the coolest, most awesome headline in the history of headlines. Ready for it? Here it is:

Woman riding donkey fights off lion with machete

I bolded, embiggened, and crimsonized the headline for you, gentle readers, to emphasize the inherent radness of these beautiful words.

This headline is wicked in many ways. First, who ever thought they would see those words strung together in that particular order? Not me, and I spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about the coming human/animal wars. Second, I personally think it's rad that she didn't even get off the donkey to fight the lion. Third, she used a machete. If you can't understand how unbelievably gnarly it is to battle one of natures most fearsome predators while riding a donkey and working it over with a freaking machete, you should stop reading this blog immediately and start listening to Radio Disney.

So, unnamed Mexican Warrior-Queen, TWWOT has officially doffed it's hat to you, and if there were some sort of patch for donkey/machete/lion fighting that I could send to you, I would.


Anonymous said...

When it's time to repel feline boarders amidships of your ass, crude horticultural instruments are handy to have. She clearly chose to kick death in the nuts because she had some stuff to do.

J.R.Shirley said...

Woah! It's a real lion! I read "Mexican" and thought, where's the journalistic responsibility?

Forgive my momentary lapse of faith, o great one.

Anonymous said...

"...fights off lion with machete."

Uh...I thought the lion had the machete.